Every parent says “We don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl as long as we have a healthy baby.” But what if you don’t have a healthy baby? What if from day one your precious little bundle of joy is sick? In and out of hospitals and doctors offices and you don’t have a clue what is going on? What then?
Our daughter,
Carlee, was born full term and even though I ended up needing an emergency c
section, she seemed to be happy and healthy. We were sent home 2 days later and
everything seemed perfect.
When she was
7 days old she became extremely lethargic, refused to eat, and had blood in her
stool. Carlee spent the next 5 days of her life undergoing tests and being
monitored very closely at our local Children’s Hospital. The doctors couldn’t
seem to agree on what could be causing the lethargy and bloody stool. All of
the tests came back fine and she seemed to be getting better. They switched her
to a new formula, Nutramigen and diagnosed her with protein intolerance. We
were sent home. We took her for weekly weight checks at her pediatrician’s
office. She was still not gaining weight and still had blood in her stool. We
were referred to a GI specialist who immediately prescribed her Neocate
formula. The Neocate worked wonders and our little girl finally started gaining
weight.
When she was 4 weeks old her doctor noticed that her kidneys felt a bit swollen and sent us for an ultrasound. She was diagnosed with Hydronephrosis (a backup of urine that causes the kidneys to swell) and referred to a pediatric urologist. At this point I was freaking out. I had no idea what Hydronephrosis was and what this meant for my baby. Of course I did what every nervous mom does and searched the internet for answers while we waited for her Urology appointment. I found very little and that only made me more anxious.
When she was 4 weeks old her doctor noticed that her kidneys felt a bit swollen and sent us for an ultrasound. She was diagnosed with Hydronephrosis (a backup of urine that causes the kidneys to swell) and referred to a pediatric urologist. At this point I was freaking out. I had no idea what Hydronephrosis was and what this meant for my baby. Of course I did what every nervous mom does and searched the internet for answers while we waited for her Urology appointment. I found very little and that only made me more anxious.
At 3 months
old, Carlee’s Urologist sent her for a test called a VCUG (Voiding Cystourethrogram). A VGUG is an X-ray
that helps determine the bladder capacity and emptying abilities. A
catheter is inserted so dye can be injected. As the bladder is filling with
this dye, X-rays are taken. The catheter is then removed and additional X-rays
are taken while she urinated. Once the bladder is emptied, a final X-ray is
taken. The entire test takes approximately one hour. – Now imagine all of that
happening to your precious 3 month old who is scared out of her mind. It was
awful and unfortunately it was the first of many.
The VCUG
showed that Carlee had Vesicoureteral Reflux (VUR), also known as Kidney
Reflux. VUR is the abnormal flow of urine from your bladder back up the tubes
(ureters) that connect your kidneys to your bladder. Normally, urine flows only
down from your kidneys to your bladder. She also had a duplicated ureter, which
meant that she had an extra tube connecting her kidney and bladder that should
not have been there.
VUR increases
the risk of urinary tract infections which, if left untreated, can cause
serious kidney damage. Other complications include hypertension and kidney
failure. While some children outgrow this, some need surgery to cure it.
When I heard
this news I was at first relieved that we finally had an answer, a name to call
it. Then, I was so upset that there was something wrong with my little girl
that I couldn’t fix. I could cuddle her, love her, sing to her, feed her,
change her, and none of that would fix this. I was completely dependent on what
the doctors could do.
Carlee was
prescribed an antibiotic to take daily to prevent possible infections. The plan
was to pray that she would outgrow this as she got older. She would have tests
every 3 months to monitor the condition of her kidneys and to see if the VUR
got better or worse.
I am the type of
mother who needed to know everything about this condition in order to get
through it. I searched and searched for more information to better understand
VUR and duplicated ureters. I only found medical mumbo jumbo articles that
didn’t make any sense to me. I needed to know what was in store for my daughter
and what we do if she doesn’t outgrow it. I finally found the support I needed
in several Facebook groups for parents going through the same thing. I talked
with several mothers who seemed to be experts on this and relief washed over
me. My daughter was not the only one dealing with this. This was not something
I would have to go through feeling we were alone in this journey. Over the next
few months I learned so much about VUR from hearing other people’s stories. Carlee was the happiest baby. Even through all of this she always had a smile on her face. She was beautiful, smart, goofy, and most of all strong.
Right after
her 1st birthday she started getting sick. Her pediatrician said it
was a cold and sent us home. This was nearly 9 months after her diagnoses so I
figured it probably was just a bad cold.
Tylenol and Motrin were not helping her fever. The next night her fever
sky rocketed and she started shaking and staring off into space. She wouldn’t
respond to us and we called an ambulance. We chose to go to our local ER
because it was closer than the Children’s Hospital. The ER doctor…..how do I
put this….well he was an idiot. He didn’t even know what VUR was. Told us that
what definitely looked like a seizure to me was just “the chills” and sent us
home. Her fever went back to normal so we went home and hoped she would rest
and be better the next morning.
She wasn’t
better the next morning and we took her to the Children’s Hospital. After we
told them her history with VUR they immediately did a Urinalysis. Since she
wasn’t potty trained being only 12 months, they had to insert a catheter to get
a sample. My poor baby had to be held down because she would not be still. I
felt awful because she was so scared but I knew that it needed to be done. The
results came back a few hours later and she did in fact have a UTI (Urinary
Tract Infection).
Now I’m
freaking out (in my head of course so I don’t upset Carlee.) Does this mean
that the antibiotics that she takes every single day are not working anymore?
What do we do now? Why does she all of a sudden get a UTI after 9 months of
having no problems? Nothing made sense.
She was put
on another antibiotic for 10 days to fight the infection and sent home. She
seemed to get better. Her fever was gone, she started to eat better and seemed
more like herself. After she was finished with the 10 days of antibiotics we
were told to put her back on what she had been taking daily to prevent
infections.
One week
later it all started over again. High fever, not eating or drinking, and
Tylenol was not helping. We called her Urologist and were sent in to test her
urine again. She had another UTI. That makes 2 in less than 20 days…
She was given yet
another antibiotic and we were told to call if her fever did not go down soon.
She wouldn’t eat or drink. She wouldn’t play with her toys. All she wanted to
do was cuddle with mommy or daddy. She started throwing up every time we gave
her the antibiotic. We called her Urologist and he said to come in right away.
He wanted her admitted for IV fluids and antibiotics. She spent 2 days in the
hospital confined to a crib/bed because of the IV. It was heartbreaking but I
knew all I could do was be strong because that was the only option. Once she
started eating and drinking again we were finally able to go home.
1.
Give
her more time. Stay on antibiotics and keep praying that she would outgrow this
on her own. (The doctor said this was very unlikely at this point but that he
would give her a little more time if that’s what we truly wanted.)
2.
Deflux,
a minimally invasive outpatient procedure, a gel material is injected around
the ureter opening to stop urine from flowing back up. (50%-60% success rate
for her grade of VUR and it was likely that she would need a second Deflux
procedure)
3.
Ureteral
Reimplant, open surgery where the ureters are re implanted into the bladder to
correct reflux. (93%-98% success rate, 2 day hospital stay, 2-3 week recovery)
How does a
parent choose? I trusted her doctor completely and knew that we couldn’t just
wait and see if she outgrew this for any longer. We needed to choose between
Deflux or reimplant surgery. We loved the idea of Deflux since it was an
outpatient procedure but we didn’t want to have to put her through that twice.
Even then the success rate was low. If it didn’t work she would need the
reimplant surgery anyways.
We hated
thinking about our baby girl having such a major surgery like the reimplant but
it really seemed like the best choice for Carlee. It was going to be extremely
hard but we knew it would be worth it in the end. She would be VUR Free and she
wouldn’t be in and out of the hospital anymore. Nearly every VUR parent has to
make this decision at some point and there is no right choice. Every child and
situation is different.
When Carlee was 16
months old we walked through the hospital doors scared out of our minds. How
were we supposed to hand our daughter over to these doctors and nurses and
trust that they would bring her back to us? I know it sounds dramatic but when
you are a parent in that moment that is what goes through your head. The
hardest thing I’ve ever had to do is watch my little girl fall asleep under the
anesthesia and then leave her.The surgery was supposed to take 2-4 hours. It ended up taking close to 7 hours, 7 of the longest hours of my life.
On February
28th 2013 (one year ago today) she had more testing to see how well the surgery helped. Carlee
was VUR FREE!!
Right before
Carlee’s 2nd birthday she had one more ultrasound scheduled. We were
not expecting to hear that while her VUR was gone, one of her kidneys had
healed too tightly and was not draining completely. She needed another surgery.
The doctor needed to place a stent so that her kidney would drain completely.
It was a very short 10-15 minute surgery and the stent would be removed 6 weeks
later. She had the surgery a week later.
We got home that
afternoon and Carlee was in horrible pain. She was having bladder spasms and
would not urinate because it hurt so much. We called the doctor and he
prescribed something for the spasms. It did not help. Her body was completely rejecting
the stent. Two days after it was placed the stent was removed. We spent another
2 days in the hospital because my sweet girl was so traumatized by the painful
urinating that she refused to go. She held it for so long that the nurses had
to drain her bladder with a catheter several times. The Urologist and I had a
serious talk and he explained that if she kept holding it for so long it was
going to continue to hurt when she released it because her bladder was being
stretched. If this continued I would have to learn to use a catheter to drain
her bladder at home. We decided to take
her home where she would be more comfortable and relaxed. We hoped that this
would help her get back going more often. She did better after about a week.
Last month,
we had more testing to see if the stent helped even though it was only in for a
few days. We got the greatest news ever. Her kidneys are draining and her bad
kidney has increased in function! We don’t have to take her back for more
testing for an entire year. How amazing it was to hear that! After 2 years of
this hell it is finally over. My little girl can finally just be a happy and
healthy little girl and not go through tests all the time.
She still associates going pee with pain sometimes. We are still working with her on that. Otherwise she is a normal 2 ½ year old. She is my crazy, bossy, sweet, funny, smart, strong, loveable little girl. And I would do it all over again for her if I had to.
I have learned so
much in the last 2 years.
I have learned nearly everything about a kidney condition that I didn’t even know existed before. I’ve learned that no matter how bad you think you have it, there is always someone else out there that is dealing with more than you are. So be thankful for what you have even if it’s not very much. I’ve learned that being a mother changes you completely, and being a mother to a child with health issues changes you even more. I’ve learned how lucky we are to have so many friends and family there for us along this journey. I don’t know what I would do without them.
I have learned nearly everything about a kidney condition that I didn’t even know existed before. I’ve learned that no matter how bad you think you have it, there is always someone else out there that is dealing with more than you are. So be thankful for what you have even if it’s not very much. I’ve learned that being a mother changes you completely, and being a mother to a child with health issues changes you even more. I’ve learned how lucky we are to have so many friends and family there for us along this journey. I don’t know what I would do without them.
Thank you for reading our story and for the opportunity to share it. If your child is dealing with a kidney condition or any health problems, remember that you are not alone.
“Sometimes heroes reside in the hearts of small children fighting big battles."
(Carlee with
her little sister, Sophia.)
You can find Morgan on Instagram at mommyoftwo72049
Wow! My sweet 3 month old boy was diagnosed yesterday with VUR. level 5. My heart is broken. Your blog helps shed some light on what we may be up against for the next few years. I'm so so scared.
ReplyDeleteHang in there! Any diagnosis can be a challenge--I'm glad you've found some information that might be helpful. This was a guest post done by a friend and I let her know about your comment as well. Hugs!
DeleteSo thankful she is doing better. My 10 month old spent the first 4 months of her life crying all the time. First treatment for UTI was at 2 months of age, antibiotics cause her to have watery stools and got dehydrated. Went to emergency room where she had her 2nd catheter done in just a weeks time and given a iv for dehydration and antibiotic through iv. Went home she was feeling great for about 2 weeks. Again started getting fussy and wanting to do nothing but cry, still no fever nothing. Dr thought to change her milk so we did. Then one night i went to check on her before going to bed and touched her head and she was burning up, woke up my husband cause my baby girl was just spaced out, wouldn't respond to anything. Rushed to the emergency room but made it 10 minutes down the road and she was getting worse. Pulled into the fire station and they called an ambulance to come get her. Another catheter, and iv she had another infection. Did the test with the x-ray and catheter and the dye stuff. Found out she had grade 3 in right kidney only. She has been on daily dose of antibiotics since and has been the happiest baby ever. I just pray after reading your story your little one stays healthy and the antibiotics don't stop working for my little one. I cried the whole time reading this story cause I know the feeling of having your baby look up at you and beg with those eyes and tears to make the Dr's stop.
ReplyDeleteHi
ReplyDeleteMy son is also having grade 4 reflux. did a scan but shows no scarring. he will be moving on to foods soon. what kinda diet did you maintain for your child. please advise. million thanks.
No special diet is needed due to kidney reflux. Water water and more water never hurts though! There is a possible connection between VUR and constipation so if your son starts having that problem just increase fiber in his diet. Otherwise enjoy his first foods!
DeleteHi Morgan..thank you for your reply..do you have instagram? my baby only has 1 kidney..still no advice from the surgical team..do i have to avoid potatoes or high potassium foods...every week i bring baby for blood tests to check his creatinine level...
DeleteSo sorry, I just saw this! She does have Instagram @teachingmytwo - that's how I found her.
DeleteI am 38 now and went through everything your daughter did as a kid. Except I was old enough to remember and didn't have my surgery until I was 9. I am happy to say that it worked!! She won't remember the pain and it is awesome you guys caught it so early!!
ReplyDeletei am so happy everything is well with carlee! our 2 year old is having surgery on december 5th and i am terrified so it was nice to read your post :0)
ReplyDeleteI hope his surgery went well!
DeleteHi. I would like to get into contact with this lady. My daughter has been through the same things and now more.
ReplyDeleteJanene
Hi Janene! Feel free to find me on Instgram. I am now @lotsoflittles2love
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